Do the Shoes match the Purs…, I Mean, Wallet?

Those are not my sandals.

They came in the mail.

They actually fit in our streetside mailbox up here on the knoll; the intended recipient’s feet are not all that big, so that’s no surprise.

I sent a message to the Significant One regarding the fact that she’d received mail, and she asked that I open the package because she wasn’t at all sure what she’d ordered.

Then, when the footwear was revealed, she recalled needing them and asked that I place them in my carry-on for our vacation liaison in a week or so, somewhere clearly warmer than it is here right now.

We are meeting there, onsite, because that’s what works. I think she’s in Tennessee right now, but I’m not really sure. She claims she will arrive in the land of warmth before I do and promised to pick me up at the airport.

Now that I have her sandals, I know she won’t forget about me coming.

I don’t think, anyway.

My concerns are like any man who isn’t wholly in touch with his feminine side.

“What if they search my carry-on?”

I’ve decided to shout out, “They are mine,” if the search occurs. They certainly won’t ask me about them; they have other significant things to be concerned about. I simply think it will be fun to act as if they are, somehow, illegal.

That’s all I have to say about that.

The second point I’d like to address today is that I have been shopping for a new wallet.

The one depicted, with MY new sandals, cost me eleven dollars on Amazon about four or five years ago. However, I want something even more minimalist.

I don’t carry much stuff.

While most wallets are created for folks who only carry cards, and believe paper money is extinct, I want one that totes some cash.

I am not a believer in the always-there dependability of the electrical grid, and I’ve seen what happens when it’s not operating as intended.

Cash is king, at least until they try to put a chip in my arm; at that point, Timmy is out.

I digress.

I’ve written about it before, but searching for something, anything at all, unleashes the full fury of every seller, retailer, influencer, and, in this case, wallet connoisseur that ever walked the earth.

I had no idea there were at least 20 options for minimalist EDC (Every Day Carry) wallets, some made from carbon fiber, aluminum, titanium, and other precious metals excavated by minors in third-world countries. And yes, Annette, I meant to spell “minors” that way.

This morning, first up in my feed was a fellow who has used the same tiny wallet for ten years, and he’s even carried it to Europe.

Wow!

He says he’s had two children since he bought it, and I should buy the same one. It’s shaped to fit your front pocket.

His demeanor created the impression that it’s a tougher duty to carry a wallet across the ocean, on a plane, than to have it fall out of your pocket on a motorcycle ride down a dirt road.

Now, I don’t know how taking a wallet to Europe is harder than taking it to, say, Trenton, Maine, but when you hold up a worn wallet and make your voice deeper and snarlier, it probably will lead someone to believe it’s a sturdier wallet than mine.

“I carried mine to work today,” just doesn’t have the same macho feel.

So, after shopping for an hour, I decided to skip the new EDC wallet; the one I liked was $125.00. Seriously, it is.

After the forced feeding of social media wallet reviews, including one person saying he trusts his life to the two designers, I cannot compete, even if I were given a wallet to review—gratis—by the owners.

Neither of them has saved my life; I just want a wallet small enough to keep my lower lumbar region from hurting, and one that also has space for cash without using straps and pulleys to reach my debit card.

However, if one of the premium wallet companies sends me one of their offerings, I will gladly complete a video review where I won’t sound like I’ve conquered Kilimanjaro because of my wallet choice.

We’ve got about 90,000 followers on the TimCotton-Author page, most of them women, but I think many women have a man who needs a new wallet, so I might be the world’s most perfect marketer.

And, I do want a new wallet.

I will be the guy hauling ladies’ sandals through the airport. There is no tougher duty than that, and I don’t believe my current wallet can take that kind of abuse.

Please send me a wallet, and let’s see if we can sell some of those beauties.

Have a great Monday.

From the Jagged Edge of America, I remain,

P.S. Here come the sandal ads!

#wallet

#EDCWallet

#daintysandals

*As always, thanks to my BuyMeACoffee supporters, book buyers, blog readers, and Facebook friends. Follow me on FB, subscribe if you choose, but most all, thanks for reading the stuff. TC

Coffee & Chocolate

Barnes & Noble

This is one of the best books I have read in years. It has tenderness and warm, gentle humor - and several laugh out loud spots. Give yourself a gift and read this. You will better about life.

Amazon Customer October 9, 2020

Amazon

I loved every bit of this book. I’ve been following the Bangor Police page and then Tim Cotton’s page on Facebook for years now. I think of it as a tiny little piece of my day that I can count on to make me feel something – usually something good, comforting in some way, occasionally a wee bit of sadness, but sad in that wistful way that a person appreciates. This man writes the way I often find myself thinking in my own head. He points out all the commonalities that we have as people, rather than the differences. The differences he writes about are the superficial ones, and the ones that make us interesting. I stretched this book out for quite a long time, reading a chapter or two in between other books. It’s a great place to turn when a person wants to occupy their minds with something peaceful that helps us to understand the world and our place in it just a little more.

Unhappy July 1, 2020

I’ve enjoyed Tim Cotton’s stories and ramblings on Facebook (or The Book of Faces, as he calls it) for a while now. And having a whole book of his musings is the reading equivalent of binge watching Netflix (something I’ve only recently learned about during the lockdown). Cotton talks about the little things and he tells it like it is. But it would be a mistake to say he has ‘no filter’ – he most definitely has a filter and it’s a filter of kindness and compassion. I liked Chapter 5 ‘The Cop’ best. It’s more fictional than the rest, and I hope it’s a hint of a novel to come?

Wrenn December 30, 2020

I have read this book 4 times now; the first 2 times I read it slowly, trying not to let it end too soon. I decided to read a few other things after that – Hamlet, Great Expectations, A Time to Kill, A Time for Mercy, Little Women. The entire time I was reading those books I longed to go back and read The Detective in the Dooryard again. When I picked it up for the third time, I felt like I was sitting down with an old friend I hadn’t seen in years, the kind you know so well you can pick right back up where you left off. The Detective in the Dooryard is a collection of stories, some about Tim Cotton’s experiences as a Bangor, Maine police officer and Detective; some are about memories of things that shape us all into who we are today. Tim often references music, mostly from the 60’s, 70’s and 80’s. Just the mention of a song’s title makes me remember growing up and coming of age during those years, and I am immediately taken back to people, places and events in my past – some good, some bad, but always just as clear as if I were there. Tim’s writing is so descriptive you feel as if you are there inside each story as well; some of his writing actually takes my breath away. There is a lot of humor, wry sarcasm, wit, and deft handling of sometimes difficult subjects. This book is the touch of your Mother’s hand on your forehead when you’re sick, your favorite treat as a child; it’s coming home. Can’t wait for the next one

Hannah January 6, 2021

This book is like a warm hug. I honestly don’t want to put it down, but I also don’t want it to end. The struggle is real. It is not a mystery that you think you can figure out and refuse to put it down to prove to yourself you’re smarter than the author, but it feels so good and real you want to read more. Maybe I’m biased because I grew up in Maine and Tim Cotton’s lyric writings immediately put me back in the Maine woods and setting sun as I try to get every bit of light to take in the last bit of beauty from the day. It really is poetic, and funny, and relatable. You don’t have to be a big old sentimental Mainer like me to thoroughly enjoy this book, you just have to be a human living in a chaotic world looking for a happy release. Would I recommend this book; YES, SIR! Will I be giving up my copy any time soon, probably not. I know I’ll pick this book up whenever I need a warm hug, a feeling that I’m home in Maine snuggled up on my gram’s homemade quilt, and a moment of happy calm. Pick this up and enjoy! You’re welcome!

TIM COTTON WRITES

Coffee & Chocolate

Amazon Customer October 9, 2020

Unhappy July 1, 2020

Wrenn December 30, 2020

Hannah January 6, 2021